Surprise

Today's blog post is another Formspring Question. This one is from fellow TWCS author, Lindsey Gray. Thank you Lindsey for the question.

What was the most surprising aspect of the BDSM world that you found out while researching for the series?

There are a few ways I could approach this question. A lot of things 'surprised' me about BDSM. I went into writing this story with very little knowledge. I had no friends in the lifestyle, no Doms or subs that I could go to with questions. My upbringing was also rather conservative. I had very limited knowledge of any other types of relationships other that the one I was exposed to. 

I'd have to say the most surprising thing I found, however, was the diversity. There are basic guidelines in BDSM, but after that, it's pretty much up to the players involved and their particular fetishes. There are those who only practice the D/s side of BDSM with no corporal punishment or play. On the flip side of that, there are those whose relationship entails intense pain play.  

Most people outside of the lifestyle seem to have a singular view of BDSM and those involved in the lifestyle, I was one of them. That just isn't the case. The different ways to live BDSM are as varied as those who live it. No two couples are exactly alike and neither is the way the practice the lifestyle. 

So now I throw the question out to you. What is the most surprising thing you've learned about BDSM?